As I grew I began to understand what so many women and men for that matter would call the beauty of being pregnant. I felt incredible and had incredible energy! Aside from a few aches and pains that my Chiropractor was able to take care of...I was awesome! Working 40 - 50 hours a week and still teaching I felt like a wonder women.
Until it all crashed. I went in for a routine check up and my doctor told me I had to stop working for fear of going into early labour. I was 30 weeks along. I was angry with my doctor. I loved my job and thought I was doing well. She explained it as 'a little too well as the baby thinks it is time to be born'. And looking back...I was working too hard but my body (up until then) showed no signs! I had to stop everything cold turkey. (Having put a lot of personal value in my job, this was shocking to say the least)
I began to feel lost at this point. And it was a turning point for me....in many aspects. It was after this occurred that my boss emailed me (not even a week of being away from my job), letting me know that when I came back from mat leave, that my services as a manager were no longer needed, but they still wanted me to teach. Heart broken...I replied no thanks. I had been offered another job and was going to turn it down, when this all happened...I accepted it. Which meant moving.
As any yogi or yogini would know, being in a posture and having proper alignment is key to being safe in your posture. Having body awareness comes with time, as beginners, mirrors can be used to help. It was as if a virtual clothe had covered my mirror and replaced it with a terrible image of who I perceived myself to be. I could no longer see myself and how out of alignment I had become.
I had hit a brick wall...and didn't make it through the other side. I began to shut down.
However, f you knew me, you wouldn't have known it. I think I had fooled everyone until recently...now that my daughter is 5 months old. It is time to talk truth.
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